Monday, November 13, 2006


Monday, November 13, 2006
What We Want Current mood: thankful Category: Romance and Relationships

If we could all go into relationships knowing what we want I just wonder if there would be less break ups, less divorce and more happiness?
First comes the hard part- figuring out what we want. Like many, I had to take the long, hard road to finally see what I wanted. I entered marriage with a jaded sense of what I wanted, knowing I did not want what I had but choosing to settle for less and blinding myself with the belief that I could "change him" and make him what I needed. Even though it took years of heartache, abuse, tears and pain I am glad that I have that experience- it allowed me to finally figure out what I want and what I absolutely DO NOT want.
I will admit that marriage was the most lonely time of my life. I was more lonely living with someone who do did not love me and looked at me with hatred than I am living without a man and sleeping alone every night. No longer am I lonely because I finally know what I want. It is that comfort of knowing that makes me fill fulfilled and whole inside. Even if it takes me years to find that someone that has what I want I can wake up each day with the security of knowing I will never live in misery again!
Honesty with each person we meet is essential to prevent hurt and regret in the long run. Just being up front about what we want is not going to hurt anyone- certainly not ourselves! Why waste time with someone who is not ready to settle down when you are? Why try to make a boy into a man? Why try to make someone who is completey unavailable emotionally love you? Why wait on someone's call who has better things to do than call you? Why obsess over someone who is already taken? Why maintain a connection with someone who says they do not want a relationship?Why waste your love, time and friendship on someone who does not appreciate it or see it for the treasure that it is?
Why don't we all just figure out what we want and stop wasting our time on people who do not want the same thing?????
So to those of you still playing that "dating game"-----the only words of wisdom I can give you is- what do you want? Find the answer to that....and only date others who want the same thing.....

Thursday, November 2, 2006


Thursday, November 02, 2006
Putting on my Current mood: hopeful Category: Life

A few months ago a very dear friend of mine gave me a print out that has a woman looking mean as ever and on it is the phrase "Put on your 'big girl' panties and deal with it!". I never knew how much this phrase would help me get through all the heartbreaking times I have been going through- until the last few days! I have learned to do exactly that- put on my "big girl" panties and deal with it! I am pretty sure that my skin could not be any thicker and my heart could not be any tougher! But one thing I do know is that I am not bitter, nor is my heart too broken to heal and love again and again and again- however many times it takes to find the one who deserves my love! God gave us love to use it- that is His "greatest gift" to us! I refuse to let a broken heart, broken promises, let downs, hurts, betrayal, lies and did I mention a broken heart? GET ME DOWN- I will not do it! Yes I cry, yes I get mad, yes I think about revenge and yes at times I wish things were different- but you know what- they are not and I have to just deal with it, pray about it, know God will take care of me and mine- like He always does- and MOVE ON!!!
So girls the best advice I can give any of you right now is just this-